The Georgous

Georgia had a tantrum of significantly epic proportions today – much which consisted of whining and an indeterminate volume of tears. It was hard to determine what set it off or why…it was frustrating for me, almost in an anger-inducing sort of way, and yet at the same time, I could empathise  – I too remember being little, feeling at odds with myself, not knowing what I wanted and yet knowing that I could not have it or get it. I remember feeling confused, upset and utterly powerless.

Being ‘Mum’ now, I feel almost as frustrated and as powerless as I did then, but for significantly different reasons. You see, my well-behaved, smiling, nearly always co-operative toddler has now morphed in to this demanding, bossy, constantly pushing the boundaries almost-three year-old.

Over the past year I have seen her grow and learn so much and in an virtually reciprocal way, I have learnt from her, about her and of her….and yet these days I find myself on a fuse so short sometimes I wished I didn’t have to deal with her…and that’s when guilt sets in.

There are many times when I feel very fortunate to now live in a culture so diverse and so ‘alien’ to the one in which I was raised, and yet, it is just as often that I feel this maddening frustration of what I feel is an internal culture clash – particularly with regards to child-raising.

Yesterday as we joined the Wiggle and Giggle session at the Caldicot Leisure Centre, I was relieved to see that the kids were almost all about the same age as Georgia, and mostly girls too at that. Jay, was rather the odd one out, being the only boy of walking age there – the other two were crawling babies.

Nevertheless, a healthy dose of running about and bouncing and riding cars within a confined space is always welcome. It did not take long however before a lesson arose…this time it was a lesson on Empowerment and saying No!

Georgia with two shakers one in each hand – clearly enjoying her noise makers, and up runs another little girl, approximately the same age (2.5 – 3 years).

“Give me that!” the girl says. Georgia does a pretty good stare-down but it doesn’t stop that nasty brat from simply snatching the toy away from her. I watch this from some distance away, but in such situations, rightly or wrongly, I am rather reluctantly to intervene. My personal feeling is that, she will have to learn to stand up for herself, and rather than fight her battles for her, I would like to teach her and furnish her with the tools to stand up for herself.

Jun who also witnesses the whole event starts saying, in Mandarin “Take it back, take it back.” Thankfully, Georgia did not understand that bit of Mandarin – although I’m sure it’s only a matter of time.

Soon she comes running up to me with a pout, “That little girl snatched from me!”
“I know…” I say, “She’s nasty, but you must learn to say No! Don’t snatch!” 

 She does a couple of practise commands and seems quite confident but all the empowerment seems to fizzle away when the same brat comes up again and tries to relieve her of the one other toy. She’s persistent this kid, it takes me several tries before she finally gets the message that she will not be allowed to snatch from Georgia.

BUT while I am displeased with that toddlers behaviour, I am disgusted by the fact that her mother and her friend are sat hidden out of view in the bouncy castle – oblivious to the entire proceedings. Hence my question – why don’t Mothers mother?

Silly mummy – did just that!

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No way…not for love nor money.

One would imagine that really, in a modern developed country, access to healthcare would be routine, simple even, but wait a minute, the last two instances when I’ve rung to try to get Georgia an appointment to be seen by a doctor, it’s NOT happened. 

So yesterday, after four doses of Calpol and one of Calprofen, and she still had a fever, I decided to ring the surgery for a phone appointment with the Doctor, a Doctor, ANY Doctor! Because you see, at 10.30 am, it’s too late in the morning to expect to be allocated an appointment.

So anyway, after describing her symptoms to the receptionist (does she have medical training too???) she asks, Are you sure you’re happy with a phone consult? 

Me: Well, do you have any more appointments left? 
Receptionist: Well, no…but wait let me go ask.

After 5 minutes she gets back on the phone and whaddya know, i’ve now gone from ‘yes a doctor will ring you’ to…. the urgent duty nurse will ring you later this afternoon. That’s demotion of importance in my book!

Anyway, that was yesterday. G had her fever until mid-morning today and then all was well again, thankfully!

And what off that phone consult with the nurse? Well, she was a nice, polite, seemingly caring nurse, but the healthcare professionals must have lessons in medical-diversions. See, in the end, we took a drive to the surgery to let the nurse look over her, and we ended up with three, I kid you not, three different sample pots for a urine sample, just in case it’s a urinary tract infection….  

And me, well, I fell for it. I know kids with UTI, they are usually in agony, in hospitals. It was highly highly highly unlikely that Georgia had UTI. And in hindsight, the three urine samples holders were a decoy, just there to make me feel like something had been done for her…..

And we are always left with the same advice…

If you feel she is getting worse or really needs more medical attention please don’t hesitate contact us again.

…. that’s because we won’t do anything for you now!